[Milla had spent most of the morning infuriated out of her mind]
[she had heard the news secondhand, after her initial bout of rage had been calmed by Barnham and Noctis. five bodies, one in pieces, and one belonging to her roommate. to the young woman she had done everything within her power to protect]
[to the person who had pinkie promised that she would do whatever she could to stay alive]
[most of her anger is directed at the Sheriff, but. . . well. she knows she can't do anything about that right now. so after allowing her new injuries to be bandaged, Milla drags herself to the watering hole, where she swings Higekiri's sword through the air like she's trying to chop it into pieces. each movement hurts (and the painkillers she had taken to ease the pain don't help), but she works through it as best as she can. she needs to work out this anger. she needs to calm herself.]
[by the time she's finished in the afternoon, she's exhausted and sore and in desperate need of a nap or, at the very least, some meditation time. and so, she makes her way back to the hotel. and this is where Xion can find her-- limping her way through down, one arm wrapped around the bruises she had aggravated in her fight with the coyotes the night before]
[ The middle of town isn't where she expected to find her friend. She's out and about herself, though for no immediately obvious reason. Whatever she was up to, she stops it when she spots Milla and just heads straight for her, immediately lifting a hand to her shoulder. ]
What are you doing? You're hurt! You should be...
[ Her voice trails off. She can imagine why Milla isn't resting. Quietly: ]
[the voice is familiar, and surprisingly, it helps soothe some of the restlessness that had been bubbling in her stomach since she woke up that morning. Milla looks up just in time to see Xion reach for her shoulder, and she offers the young woman a smile]
[it's a tired smile, but she's trying. she can be strong, no matter how much her body wants to give out on her, no matter what strange and unwanted things her emotions are doing right now]
Xion. Of course you can; I was just about to return to my room.
[he room, which is filled with pictures and artwork and flowers and other reminders of Yuna. but she knows she can't avoid it forever. and she won't avoid it. she'll face it head-on with strength and bravery, like Maxwell should]
Yeah, no, she definitely wants to come, now. Milla shouldn't have to be alone for what's coming. Xion will nod, offering a sad little smile in return. ]
Let's take our time. I don't want you straining yourself any worse, okay?
[ She's this close to saying lean on me, if you need to, but refrains. Yuna likely wouldn't say yes, anyway. ]
[tbh, company is a good thing right now, and Milla knows it. it's why she doesn't turn Xion away. plus, it helps that Xion herself is a calming, comforting presence]
Thank you. I'll. . . be fine.
[she thinks. she knows she didn't re-break anything in her coyote fight the night before, but her ribs sure do hurt like hell nevertheless]
I think I agitated my injuries last night, but it isn't anything too serious. It isn't affecting my breathing this time around.
[Milla is silent for a few long moments after that. she can feel the guilt creeping to the surface again, the same guilt she had when Tarvek was condemned to death due to her faulty logic]
. . .
I know.
[she does, truly. deep down, in her heart, she doesn't really blame herself per se. but even so. . .]
Though I wish there had been more we could have done.
[why couldn't she have protected them both? why weren't she and Jason enough. . .?]
We probably will. [ It's said softly, with no bitterness. ] There could be as many as five killers, with five people dead. That's going to cause a lot of confusion. And... everyone's going to be upset.
[ Chane. Yuna. Well-liked, especially Yuna. ]
If arguments break out, if could be really bad. I'm...
[ ........ ]
To be honest, I'm really worried about what Felix might do.
I don't really know why I feel this way. Like I said, it's mostly just a feeling.
[ At least by now they've reached the hotel. She'll lead the way inside, glancing at her with some worry. ]
Do you want to get anything before we head up?
[ This has ... two meanings. The obvious one, of just wanting to help her get comfortable. But there's also the subtle question included with the word "we" - does Milla want Xion to come with her for this? ]
Sometimes it's best to follow our instincts. Perhaps it'll be worth it to keep an eye on him at the trial.
[says the woman who has always relied on her heart to guide her. regardless, when they reach the hotel, Milla shakes her head and gestures for Xion to follow her up to the second floor]
No, I'm all right. Let's keep going.
[aka there isn't anything she needs before they continue to her room, and she does indeed want Xion to follow]
[Milla's moving pretty slowly too, despite the fact that her ribs are healing. the fight with the coyotes and her new injuries certainly didn't help her recovery, and she looks more exhausted today than she's ever looked during these past five weeks]
[but still, she perseveres]
[she opens the door to her room and steps aside to let Xion enter first. when she does, she'll find that said room is decorated with artwork: a black and white picture of roasted potatoes, some folded paper birds hanging on the walls, and a portrait of Yuna painted by Ezio. it's a colorful room, clearly tailored to the occupants' interests. Milla sighs as she steps in behind Xion and closes the door behind her]
[ Wandering in here feels so surreal. It truly feels like the both of them. It certainly feels like Yuna. Her pervasive cheer, her hope, her stalwart faith even in the face of so much death...
This is definitely a room she'd live in. This is hers.
Xion has moved to the center of it, looking around with a wistful look on her face. When Milla speaks, Xion will turn and move back towards her, reaching out to take one of her hands and give it a squeeze. ]
I felt the same way, after Tarvek.
[ She glances around again, her smile very sad. ]
It's so like her, somehow. Everything in here... this seems like the kind of room Yuna would live in.
[Milla gladly allows Xion to take her hand, and she returns that squeeze with a small one of her own. it's. . . comforting. and it helps reassure her even when Tarvek is mentioned, and some of that old guilt from week three resurfaces]
It is, isn't it? I find the color to be particularly representative of her personality. I'll have to make sure to maintain the tidiness of her possessions in her absence.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
week 5, friday afternoon
[she had heard the news secondhand, after her initial bout of rage had been calmed by Barnham and Noctis. five bodies, one in pieces, and one belonging to her roommate. to the young woman she had done everything within her power to protect]
[to the person who had pinkie promised that she would do whatever she could to stay alive]
[most of her anger is directed at the Sheriff, but. . . well. she knows she can't do anything about that right now. so after allowing her new injuries to be bandaged, Milla drags herself to the watering hole, where she swings Higekiri's sword through the air like she's trying to chop it into pieces. each movement hurts (and the painkillers she had taken to ease the pain don't help), but she works through it as best as she can. she needs to work out this anger. she needs to calm herself.]
[by the time she's finished in the afternoon, she's exhausted and sore and in desperate need of a nap or, at the very least, some meditation time. and so, she makes her way back to the hotel. and this is where Xion can find her-- limping her way through down, one arm wrapped around the bruises she had aggravated in her fight with the coyotes the night before]
[she's exhausted. even Maxwell has her limits]
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[ The middle of town isn't where she expected to find her friend. She's out and about herself, though for no immediately obvious reason. Whatever she was up to, she stops it when she spots Milla and just heads straight for her, immediately lifting a hand to her shoulder. ]
What are you doing? You're hurt! You should be...
[ Her voice trails off. She can imagine why Milla isn't resting. Quietly: ]
Wherever you're going, can I come with you?
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[it's a tired smile, but she's trying. she can be strong, no matter how much her body wants to give out on her, no matter what strange and unwanted things her emotions are doing right now]
Xion. Of course you can; I was just about to return to my room.
[he room, which is filled with pictures and artwork and flowers and other reminders of Yuna. but she knows she can't avoid it forever. and she won't avoid it. she'll face it head-on with strength and bravery, like Maxwell should]
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[ Doesn't Milla room with...?
....
Yeah, no, she definitely wants to come, now. Milla shouldn't have to be alone for what's coming. Xion will nod, offering a sad little smile in return. ]
Let's take our time. I don't want you straining yourself any worse, okay?
[ She's this close to saying lean on me, if you need to, but refrains. Yuna likely wouldn't say yes, anyway. ]
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Thank you. I'll. . . be fine.
[she thinks. she knows she didn't re-break anything in her coyote fight the night before, but her ribs sure do hurt like hell nevertheless]
I think I agitated my injuries last night, but it isn't anything too serious. It isn't affecting my breathing this time around.
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She's quiet then, for a moment, before saying, somewhat hesitantly: ]
Milla... whatever happened last night, I know you and Jason tried your hardest. It's not your fault, okay?
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[Milla is silent for a few long moments after that. she can feel the guilt creeping to the surface again, the same guilt she had when Tarvek was condemned to death due to her faulty logic]
. . .
I know.
[she does, truly. deep down, in her heart, she doesn't really blame herself per se. but even so. . .]
Though I wish there had been more we could have done.
[why couldn't she have protected them both? why weren't she and Jason enough. . .?]
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[ That's how she'd felt about Seizaburo. ]
I'm just glad ... you two are alive. If we'd lost you too... [ she ends up giving her head a rough shake. ] You're here. That's what matters.
... what do you think will happen in the trial tomorrow?
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[offers her companion another grateful smile, but only responds to her question verbally]
We haven't had much luck in our trials thus far. [UGH. . .] The only culprits we've captured have been those who have confessed.
It worries me, but I fear we may end up convicting someone innocent again.
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[ Chane. Yuna. Well-liked, especially Yuna. ]
If arguments break out, if could be really bad. I'm...
[ ........ ]
To be honest, I'm really worried about what Felix might do.
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[uuuugh, there's something pained in her voice as she corrects that number. she quashes it quickly in favor of her usual neutrality]
Yuna was killed by coyotes. I watched her die.
[CONCEAL DON'T FEEL DON'T LET THEM KNOOOOOOW--]
[swapping the subject to Felix is a welcomed blessing]
Felix must be heartbroken over Chane. [and now she really, truly knows what heartbreak feels like] What makes you worried about him. . .?
[Milla hadn't witnessed the, uh. crazy]
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She tries not to picture Yuna being mauled to death, and she fails.
The question gets her to pause, though maybe that's just because she's swallowing down the need to throw up. ]
... I just have this bad feeling. Like ... he might try to do something reckless. Actually... I was looking for him, but I can't find him anywhere.
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Ah. . .
[and now she frowns]
Do you think he might try to go after Chane's killer himself?
[that's the most reckless thing she can think of, in this situation]
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[ She frowns a little, unhappy and concerned. ]
I don't really know why I feel this way. Like I said, it's mostly just a feeling.
[ At least by now they've reached the hotel. She'll lead the way inside, glancing at her with some worry. ]
Do you want to get anything before we head up?
[ This has ... two meanings. The obvious one, of just wanting to help her get comfortable. But there's also the subtle question included with the word "we" - does Milla want Xion to come with her for this? ]
no subject
[says the woman who has always relied on her heart to guide her. regardless, when they reach the hotel, Milla shakes her head and gestures for Xion to follow her up to the second floor]
No, I'm all right. Let's keep going.
[aka there isn't anything she needs before they continue to her room, and she does indeed want Xion to follow]
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Milla gets a thoughtful look as she gestures, but Xion pulls in a breath simply says: ]
Okay. I'll follow you.
[ Which she will, somewhat more slowly thanks to crutches, but she Does Her Best. ]
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[but still, she perseveres]
[she opens the door to her room and steps aside to let Xion enter first. when she does, she'll find that said room is decorated with artwork: a black and white picture of roasted potatoes, some folded paper birds hanging on the walls, and a portrait of Yuna painted by Ezio. it's a colorful room, clearly tailored to the occupants' interests. Milla sighs as she steps in behind Xion and closes the door behind her]
[and then she speaks, quietly]
. . . it feels. . . empty.
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This is definitely a room she'd live in. This is hers.
Xion has moved to the center of it, looking around with a wistful look on her face. When Milla speaks, Xion will turn and move back towards her, reaching out to take one of her hands and give it a squeeze. ]
I felt the same way, after Tarvek.
[ She glances around again, her smile very sad. ]
It's so like her, somehow. Everything in here... this seems like the kind of room Yuna would live in.
no subject
It is, isn't it? I find the color to be particularly representative of her personality. I'll have to make sure to maintain the tidiness of her possessions in her absence.