[It hurts. There's something squeezing at his chest, making every breath he takes an effort. Milla is such a good friend, he realizes. He had been right in thinking she was trustworthy all those weeks ago, secretly putting his faith in her to keep Damian safe even before she knew he had learned of her role. Milla is such an amazing person, and he doesn't know what he's done to deserve having her around him. She stopped him from making a choice he would regret later, and yet—
"You believe it's better to get rid of criminals permanently. So you kill them."
He doesn't know if he'll ever escape his future. He doesn't know if his emotions will get the better of him one day, causing him to make a choice he won't ever come back from. He... Well. When he writes something down again, he has trouble meeting Milla's gaze.]
When I'm older, I become a murderer. I will kill people because I think they deserve it. [...] But that's not a future I want. I don't want to be a crook. So thank you for stopping me, Milla.
[He trusts her. She's saved his ass more than once, and... he thinks she might be the only one who's possible reaction to this doesn't make him afraid.]
[she opens her eyes to read what he wrote, and her reaction is to just. . . smile. she doesn't pass judgment against people for killing-- not even here, in this town, where people die every single week. after all, she took lives back home in her capacity as the Lord of Spirits. she killed a few men in order to save the lives of millions. her hands weren't clean, and she was okay with that]
[but to see his resolve in the words he wrote. . . that she can admire]
I believe in you.
[she says with a nod]
I believe that if that isn't the future you want, then you'll be able to make the correct choices that allow you to follow the path you most desire. And if my stopping you helped you stay on that path, then. . . you're welcome.
[Jason is a good kid, anger issues or not. she has faith in him. she has faith in his future]
Good to know this continues to be true and accurate.
Which is to say, Milla continues to be one of the most amazing individuals Jason has had the pleasure of meeting. Damian would scream at him for wanting to change the future. Call him selfish, perhaps. Or an idiot, if he wants to be more accurate. But he refuses to allow his future to be decided by someone who wishes to use him as a tool against his family.]
Thank you.
[Even if he's still battling against the resentment, he means it. Thank you for believing in him, Milla.]
[AND YET EVERYONE DIED IN THE END ANYWAY??? CRIES]
[she thinks it's himself he has to worry about letting down more than her, but nevertheless, she reaches out to ruffle his hair slightly. she hadn't really tried the "physical contact as comfort" thing with Jason yet, so she doesn't know how he'll respond to same. thus, she keeps the contact short and light]
Have you tried writing Natalie a letter? If there's something you wish to say to her, then perhaps writing it down might help.
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no subject
"You believe it's better to get rid of criminals permanently. So you kill them."
He doesn't know if he'll ever escape his future. He doesn't know if his emotions will get the better of him one day, causing him to make a choice he won't ever come back from. He... Well. When he writes something down again, he has trouble meeting Milla's gaze.]
When I'm older, I become a murderer. I will kill people because I think they deserve it. [...] But that's not a future I want. I don't want to be a crook.
So thank you for stopping me, Milla.
[He trusts her. She's saved his ass more than once, and... he thinks she might be the only one who's possible reaction to this doesn't make him afraid.]
no subject
[but to see his resolve in the words he wrote. . . that she can admire]
I believe in you.
[she says with a nod]
I believe that if that isn't the future you want, then you'll be able to make the correct choices that allow you to follow the path you most desire. And if my stopping you helped you stay on that path, then. . . you're welcome.
[Jason is a good kid, anger issues or not. she has faith in him. she has faith in his future]
no subject
Good to know this continues to be true and accurate.
Which is to say, Milla continues to be one of the most amazing individuals Jason has had the pleasure of meeting. Damian would scream at him for wanting to change the future. Call him selfish, perhaps. Or an idiot, if he wants to be more accurate. But he refuses to allow his future to be decided by someone who wishes to use him as a tool against his family.]
Thank you.
[Even if he's still battling against the resentment, he means it. Thank you for believing in him, Milla.]
I promise I won't let you down.
no subject
[she thinks it's himself he has to worry about letting down more than her, but nevertheless, she reaches out to ruffle his hair slightly. she hadn't really tried the "physical contact as comfort" thing with Jason yet, so she doesn't know how he'll respond to same. thus, she keeps the contact short and light]
Have you tried writing Natalie a letter? If there's something you wish to say to her, then perhaps writing it down might help.